God, You, & Sex…Taking The Chastity Vow…True Love Waits Till It Is Right

Teenagers are in a pressure cooker!  Pressure from the inside, and pressure from the outside.  Can a young person really live with a Chastity Vow in today’s economy?  YES!  Read and find out how!

“My boyfriend is asking me to.”

“The girls at school are talking about how fun it is.”

“The guys are bragging about what girls let them do to them.”


Who do you talk to when you have questions about intimate relationships?  Who can you talk to?  Your parents, or perhaps your Youth Leader at church?  If you are like many teens, you will gravitate to talking to your peers.  The pressure is on, Teenager!  It is like you are in a pressure cooker with the temperature rising daily.  I want to suggest to you that your peer group may not be the best people to talk to when it comes to this subject matter.

I do want to address this subject from a biblical and practical manner.  It is a very important topic, and needs to be examined in light and instruction from the One who created intimacy.  God the Father gave Eve a help.  She was a help meet for Adam.  “Meet” means “designed for; fit; suitable; proper; qualified; convenient; adapted, as to a use or purpose.”  Woman was taken out of man (Genesis 2:23).  The woman was made for the man (I Corinthians 11:8, 9).  When God created woman, He did so after stating “…It is not good that the man should be alone;  I will make him an help meet for him.” Genesis 2:18.

It is God’s design and desire for men to have an help, and for women to be the help.  Not just a help for a moment, or for a night, or for a year.  The help you are created to be, or the help that you are created to have, is an help that is properly qualified for each other for life.  One man for one woman, period. Genesis 2:24, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”  God’s plan is always the best.  There is not a plan “B”, or a plan “C”.  When God created woman, He did not give Adam a choice between a blonde, brunette, or red head.  He didn’t ask Adam to choose his wife; God placed them together for life.  Matthew 19:8, “He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so.”

What love Adam had for his wife!  Even in the deepest, most crucial decision to either sever the relationship, or draw closer together, Adam chose to stick to his wife.  In Genesis 3, the subtil serpent begins a conversation with Adam’s wife.  He begins with a religious conversation, something that she was interested in, and could identify with.  “…Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?” Genesis 3:1.  As this unwise conversation develops between Adam’s wife and this silver tongued devil, she ends up distorting the words of God, and deceiving herself, while she then defiles herself by eating of the fruit of the forbidden tree (Genesis 3:2-6).  Adam saw his wife now defiled, now in sin.

The choice had to be made.  Was Adam going to sever the marriage by rejecting what his wife has done, or was he going to stick to his wife and eat of the tree?  Genesis 3:6 reveals, “…she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.”  

1 Timothy 2:14, “And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.”  Adam knew what he was doing when he chose to stick with his wife.  This is the kind of love God has for us.


Ephesians 5:25, “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

26  That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,

27  That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

28  So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

29  For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:

30  For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.

31  For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

32  This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

33  Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”

Do you want your marriage to be like this?  A marriage where your husband will love you, respect you, nourish you, cherish you, wash you and present you spotless by the word of God being preeminent in your relationship?  The only way to do this is to let LOVE WAIT TILL IT IS RIGHT!  TAKE THE CHASITY VOW!  If you want as strong, and as sweet, and as spiritual a marriage that you can possibly have, during your teen and young adult life, practice

1 Corinthians 7:1, “Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.

2  Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.”  If you vow now to not to ever touch, it will help you avoid fornication.  By avoiding fornication, you can enter the marriage covenant with no regrets, no shame, and full assurance that God was your Keeper.


Let us examine God’s intricate design for vowing chastity.

First of all God planted a Garden, and put him to work, Genesis 2:15, “And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.”  Man is created to work, not to prowl and ponder and pursue a woman.  Young men should involve themselves in work and leave woman hunting up to God.


Secondly, God gave man boundaries.  Genesis 2:16, 17, “And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:

  But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.”  All young men should allow God to set boundaries in their lives.  You work, and you are walled.  You work within the wall that God sets up for you, perhaps through your parents, pastor, or youth leader.  Man was told he could have and he could  not have.  You, young men, can have some things, and some things you need to leave alone.  This is here the vow of chastity comes into being.  Make a covenant with your eyes, as Job did in Job 31:1.

This goes for young women as well!  Allow God to control this part of your life.


Thirdly, Genesis 2:18, “And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.”  God sees you, young man!  He will not withhold anything good from you.  You can trust Him for bringing your woman in His timing.


Psalms 84:11, “For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly.”


Proverbs 18:22, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.”


Thirdly, just go to sleep on this issue.  “Go to sleep?!?” you may gasp.  What does that mean?  It means that in Genesis 2:21, 22, “And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

  And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.”

The LORD put man to sleep and God brought his woman to him.


At 25 years of age, I walked into my best friend’s Sunday School Class and my woman was sitting in the class.  I noticed her, and she noticed me, yet we did not run at each other with arms open wide and our hair blowing in the wind, with the majestic music playing in the background.  We both pondered, we both wondered, and after a while, I spoke to her Dad to ask if I could start talking to her.  We were married on August 11, 1995, when I was 29 years old.

It was worth the wait.